Sending Mom Off

We left the house at 11AM and were at the airport before 11:30.  There were no long lines at the check in so we were done by 11:30.  I told Mom we can use the time to have some lunch at the foodcourt and we sat down to a McDonald’s lunch.  I was trying to make it very casual although I could feel a knot forming in my stomach — I really didn’t want her to go.  She actually handled it much better than I did.  It was good there were no tears when we eventaully said goodbye.. Mom promised to come back as soon as she can — barring any health problems that may keep her from doing so sooner than she planned.

I watched her through the glass wall as she went through the final check before going to the boarding gates, then she disappeared into the hallway leading to Gates 1-3 of Terminal 1 of the JFK airport.  I wanted to wave goodbye to her but she was way off to hear me call out to her.  I had to content myself with watching her disappear to head off to the plane that will take her home.

There was an elderly Korean man standing beside me earlier by the glass partition, and he was watching a much older lady who was right behind mom at the x-ray machines.  “Your mom?, ” I asked him — and he said yes.  I told him I was watching out for my Mom, too.

I feel a heaviness in my heart just thinking about it.  I’m being a baby, I know.  I just can’t fully express what it meant to me to have her here for a year.  And now that she’s gone back home, even if only temporarily, I feel the distance between New York and the place I used to call home again.  I’m confident the thought of Angel being alone will make her come back soon enough.  I cannot wait to have her here again.