I’ve been trying to get some reading done in between commuter stops, so today I moved on with BLINK. I’m in a section which I am sure will be helpful and interesting to those who are Speed Dating right now like my friend Demi.
While I cannot reprint the section here in the interest of brevity, I am sure Powerbooks or National Bookstore has a copy of Malcolm Gladwell’s BLINK under Non-Fiction. Go straight to page 61 and read the section that starts on that page and you don’t have to read very far to get what I mean.
I think you will find this portion of the book insightful and perhaps even helpful, as you go about speed dating.
For the rest of the population wondering what speed dating has to do with the book, it was just mentioned as one of the instances wherein our first impressions tend to become the basis of our judgment, and how we can hone our instinct to zero in on what we truly desire.
Let me save the rest for you to read in Gladwell’s book.
My copy of ILLUSIONS by Richard Bach just arrived after a two-week wait. (Hey, I’m not complaining, I got free shipping.) This is one of my forever favorite books which I eventually lost in the borrower’s circuit, and I just hope that whoever has it right now knows the value of the book they failed to return to me. I will re-read the book after BLINK, while reading Clinton’s MY LIFE. (It was from an interview with Bill Clinton where I got the idea that I don’t have to stick to reading one book at any given time. Do you know that the ex-president reads at least 5 books at any given time? It can be challenging and not for those who live by the excitement of thrillers or the passion of romance books, but I have discovered it IS doable… not five for me, though.. the most I’ve done at any given time is 3.)
But back to the subject of speed dating — it is nice to know that people in Manila are open minded enough and daring enough to indulge in this social exercise — it’s just sad to see that people have to resort to structured social encounters in their hopes of (a) widening their social circle, or (b) finding THE one. I’m not putting Speed Dating down — I’d probably be in it if it picked up speed in Manila 6-8 years ago. I think it’s a good way to get the more introverted types out into the social scene. One thing Alan and I always tell our friends who are still looking for that special someone is that you cannot sit at home in a corner and wait for your knight in shining armor to come. If it’s a knight you want, you have to be where he will be so you can snag him before he dies in the next joust.
It’s not easy finding your special someone. Both Alan and I took more than half our present lifetime to find each other, going through a lot of challenges along the way. And when we did find each other, it was a big gamble on both our parts to see the relationship through. The biggest obstacle was the 10,000 miles separating us. One of us had to uproot from home, the other had to make that happen. We did not have a long engagement — in fact we married 11 months after we hooked up again after ages and ages of no contact. (I’ll save our love story for another post.) And although we continue to face major challenges in our married life, I personally feel we have a very strong relationship founded on a good sense of humor and a true friendship.
So if you’re still out there waiting for THE ONE to show up, make sure you’re where he might be, not waiting by the window sill for him to come knocking at your door.