In the silence…

Fall sunrise - 14Nov2012

I was standing at the bus stop as the sun was rising rather late (a few minutes after 7AM) and I happened to look up and saw this glorious reflection of the sun against the autumn leaves.  (Forget about the power lines.)

Gorgeous.

I was waiting with around 4 others but I didn’t care.  Sometimes,  you just have to stop awhile and capture the moment.  It’s the appreciate-the-autumn-leaves equivalent of  stop-and-smell-the-roses.

I hate telling people things they don’t want to hear, more so when they’re being told what they’ve done needs correcting.  (I try not to say “What you did was wrong”.)  I find it amusing that people can take the time to react negatively and get all riled up, only to gloss over any explanation of why their work is just not on point.  Oh, well.  As long as I know I did my job.

I have become less tolerant of other’s anger but have sadly been given to more outbursts of mine.  Whether it is outward or inward — it gives me pause when I realize I could’ve taken things more calmly, that I can do a complete 360 and just not let my anger get the better of me.  I hear such angry words as “No pushing, ”  “I’m freaking out right now” like they were just spoken yesterday.  And then silence.

The silence reminds me that we CAN shut out those negative feelings and thoughts.  Sometimes, it just takes more effort than usual.  It’s like figuratively putting our palms to our ears so we don’t hear a thing.  These days, when I start getting mad, I pause and say a prayer.  An “Our Father”.  Or a “Hail Mary”.

I just had a penne bolognese lunch with a slice of pecan pie because it’s been a long morning.  I think better with a full stomach, although my pants are getting tighter telling me it’s time to start dieting.  (Ouch!)  Okay, it’s more for the practicality of not getting a new wardrobe — plus the more important focus on health and well-being.  The mother of another batchmate of mine just passed away last night and it got me to thinking again about how precious and fragile life can be.  So I hug more and say “I love you” as often as I can to my precious boy.

Last night, I was making “lambing” and asked him if he would cook me dinner.  Of course, he said no saying he didn’t know how to cook.  Then I tried to further prod him by saying “Girls like boys who can cook.”  And he responded in return, “I like girls who CAN cook.”  Case closed.

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