Everyone who knows me knows my world revolves around this little guy who has been the love of my life for the last 10 years. From the moment he came out into this world, my life was changed forever. Although I would discover later that it had changed even more than I had perceived, and it appears that his entry into my life had caused a drastic change in other parts of my world I didn’t even see, I would not trade his being a part of my life for anything else. No matter what challenges I have faced or am facing, knowing I have him in my life changes the face of the game. I look at him and I know I’m in a good place.
I pride myself in teaching him to be outwardly affectionate and expressive of what he feels. It’s not always easy and he is not the same way with everyone else, but that has given me precious rewards like a poster with scribblings of various declarations of love for his Mommy.
So forget that he missed out on a word or two — I get the point. Unfortunately, my son didn’t inherit my penmanship but I’m not complaining. And for my son to know my birth date and birth year shows my History professor-to-be has a knack for dates like I used to at his age. (Dates and phone numbers were easy for me, just don’t make me do Math please.)
Naturally, the Dad was jealous as can be, but the boy told him there was only one poster board. (We shall scramble for another.)
I like these little surprises he springs on me — for no reason at all, except that he thought of it one afternoon. I wish I could frame the entire poster but it was half a sheet. So I took snapshots instead and might frame one of these. I have a knack for keeping his scribblings and projects — and even at just 10, he marvels at my memory box which contains a lock of his hair, his belly button stump, his first onesie, and all that stuff. When I can, I incorporate his works into my art journal.
A friend on Facebook commented the above was so eloquently said. I couldn’t have phrased it better. I am proud that my son’s heart has the eloquence to show what it feels — and I am heartened as that bodes well for him when he grows up. That’s a precious gift that I hope I can continue to nurture. One day, he will love others — and I want him to be able to express that love the same way he has expressed his love for his current “love of his life — his Mommy.”
Children come into our lives and we are never the same again. After two miscarriages, I was almost ready to accept that I would not be given that precious gift until he came. My pregnancy was very challenging with gestational diabetes and all, but when he came out into this world, I forgot about all those challenges and focused on this new life I gave birth to.
He is the reason I am still around, and hope to be around for years to come. I look at him and I see that I have been blessed. Forget about the heartaches and the disappointments — he makes it all worth it. He alone makes the negative seem trivial compared to all the joy he exudes and the love he gives. I reach out to touch him and I feel an overwhelming reassurance that everything will be okay. I know his love is like no other.
Pinay New Yorker 