I was actually going to use another title for this blogpost and then decided on this one — and after typing it up on the Title Bar, I had to pause a few seconds to take a deep breath. It felt like one of those things you say which hits you as something you ought to listen to. Guilty.
Being a very emotional person, I usually have a knee-jerk reaction to the world around me. I guess you can say I’m guilty of not picking my battles — most of the time — but of late, I’ve found that it has served me well to actually count to ten, or mumble a prayer to let the negative feelings go, and for the most part, I’m usually successful.
I have also learned to take a step back and keep my reactions contained, whereas I would have normally just let it all out without thinking before speaking. (And of course that has caused me a lot of headaches along the way.)
I usually don’t cross post between my public fora (this blog, Instagram, Pinterest and Twitter) and Facebook which is sort of confined to people who actually know me. I guess the latter is more personal, and the others are more for mass consumption. Once in a while, I do. Without identifying what it was I cross posted, I was surprised at the very negative reaction to what was otherwise an innocent post of something I did in the course of my day from someone I hold as a very dear friend.
My first impulse was to reply to the comment. Then I thought to myself that it might stir up an exchange of words and this wasn’t a friend I would want to put in the position of having to defend the comment that was given. I picked not to go into battle — I kept my mouth shut. That is a very conscious effort for me, being that I usually speak from the top of my head. (Like I write without much editing here. I have a simple rule for the blog — if I cannot be honest or truthful about a post, then I should keep it private — or not write about it at all.) But you come to a point in your life where some things just aren’t worth it.
In the grander scheme of things, you think about the things that really matter. As one gets older, I’ve come to realize that I no longer have the energy nor the fight in me to take on the whole world. I’d rather watch it all go by from a distance. But when I do take up the cudgels to wage war, I go charging fearlessly.
I didn’t get to settle down until 11pm. tonight. Not that I didn’t have any down time today. Another two items were posted to the shop. I’ve even started creating a floral piece which I hope to make a part of some freshwater pearl earrings. I’m just too tired to go to the next phase. It can wait until tomorrow.
Meanwhile, I have just a few more things to put away and then I’ll drink my vitamins and go to bed. Maybe play slots. I’m just too sleepy to keep working.. although I might find myself at my craft corner yet after everything has been taken cared of here. Just another typical Saturday yet in my corner of the world…
Pinay New Yorker 