Wildflowers

I’ve always taken pride in paying attention to the ordinary. From a very young age, I was trained to appreciate the simple things. I think it’s important for us to never lose our childlike sense of wonder. It keeps us hopeful and optimistic. It helps us see the light instead of the darkness. Much like the glass being half full rather than half empty.

The eternal optimist, that’s who I am.

During these walks I’ve taken the last 3 weeks, I’ve opened my eyes to the wonders around, tucked between the weeds that have crept upon the growth in the forest, or in the cracks in the concrete pavement. What colors — if we will only stop and pay attention to nature’s canvas.

I used to always think about doing this — just walking around to stretch my legs, or to try and get some exercise in. I never really got to until after weeks and weeks of being cooped up indoors. I can’t believe that I’ve been doing this for longer and longer stretches of time. And I’ve taken to paying more attention to the things I walk past each time.

Sometimes they call out to us as a patch of color, but what strikes me more are the singular stems that stand out from the drab green, or the cracks in the sidewalk. Wildflowers here range in color from pastels like purple and the starker fuschia pink ones like this one I saw just this morning.

I just had to stop and take a shot. I’m sure the man walking around 200 paces behind me must’ve been baffled why I stopped in my tracks. It would’ve thrown off the distance we were trying to keep between us.

And there are the usual blooms that we see everywhere, popping up from the ground in batches, just nonchalantly standing their ground and ignoring the rest of the world. If you look closely enough, you’ll see how nature has put them together in such an intricate fashion.

More often than not, we gloss over their existence. To many, they are a nuisance ruining the monotony of the pavement where the earth gave in and a crack let them through. But such bright colors wave to us. Again, if you look closer, you’ll see how beautiful they are by themselves, or as a bunch on the ground we walk on.

They’re springing up all over these days as we get deep into summer. I’m trying to catch them before they wilt away and the green gives in to the glorious colors of fall. I love fall for the tapestry of leaves and the changing colors of the season, but autumn signals the disappearance of these beauties, both wild and nurtured in the gardens around. We have to enjoy them while we can.

See how intricate those spines around the berry-like center are? I cannot wait to see what springs forth from this bloom. I hope I see it tomorrow or the next day I walk past it again. I’ve made it a habit to look around with each pass, and stop the next time I go past it. It’s almost 400 steps around the entire quadrangle, and I usually try to keep pace with those who are ahead of me. Sometimes, I get lucky and I get to enjoy the space and have the place all to myself. I like walking here because there’s usually no more than 4 others who make sure we walk with ample space apart.

This week has been such a visual delight. It seems that every day, there is a new bloom that pops up to surprise me. Even along the highway as I walk on the last leg of my morning ritual, visual delights like these little wonders abound.

I admire them from a distance and leave them be. I want to have them there, serving as a backdrop to my feeble attempts at exercising. They bring color to the toil of walking in the summer heat, and they bring a smile to my face.

There are so many things we should be grateful for. Little things that we should not take for granted. We should stop and take notice before they fade away and another season creeps up on us.

Tomorrow as I walk again, these little beauties give me something to look forward to. I will look at them with childlike wonder and hope they stay just a little bit longer. I can’t wait to see another surprise that will stand out from the rest. Some new wonder growing out of the ordinary, here in the wild.

My summer thus far

Weeks of silence.

I have  been here and not here.  I just came back from two and a half weeks in Manila which was both long and short at the same time.  If I don’t seem to make sense as you read this post, blame it on the jetlag.

I landed just before midnight on Tuesday and was safely home after 1am the following day.  The trip is long but I’ve been doing this almost yearly the last 15 years.  It isn’t so much the butt ache that the long haul flight is, but more the pre and post heart ache of returning and leaving the land of my birth that makes a bigger impact on me each time.  This is going to be a yearly summer sojourn as the boy prefers to spend his summers with the cousins — foregoing the more festive and shorter trip home over the holidays.  This is already his second summer spent there.  We haven’t even gotten over the Jetlag yet and he is already asking to spend more time in Manila next year.  

Business commitments and projects hanging over his head  made it difficult for the dad to schedule their departure.  He brings the boy down and the deal was for me to bring him back.  Last year, the boy spent seven weeks in Manila, departing right before the Fourth of July holiday just as school ended.  Two weeks with his father and then a two week lull spent with my family and cousins on the other side.  I arrived and spent three weeks with him and my family before we flew home together to New York just in time for the school opening.  This year, we decided to bring him back two weeks before school opens so that he can adjust back more easily.  Four days since we arrived and he and I are still heavily jet lagged and working as if we were still on Manila time.  I’m doing okay– he’s going to be fine.  

My summer has been about two trips across the globe to join and celebrate bestie Donna’s 50th with her family in Fiji and this one in Manila.  I can’t complain.  I usually would be happy with local trips and just one long splurge back home, but the golden year celebration paved the way for the two trips to warmer climes.  It’s not something I’m looking to do every year– but I am happy I gave it the effort to make it happen.  Besides the obvious personal treat to have more sun and fun with people who mean a lot to me, taking these trips are part of a transition to a new world that is taking shape right now.

Trips on the local side are also transforming into something different from the usual family vacations we used to take.  I am hoping to take more solo trips in the future, although my first day visit to Boston is still in the works.  (I am hoping to pull this off by the fall to visit my friend, Doctor Lisa).  One trip at a time.  My ability to travel is changing but not being curtailed, but it is a big adjustment I’m trying to make slowly.

Many years ago at a random hair appointment at a fancy salon in the city, the stylist who did my hair then planted an idea in my head about taking trips on my own.  That isn’t exactly something I had ever considered since moving to NYC in 2000 to start a family, and even when she mentioned it, it wasn’t exactly something that I thought I would ever think of doing.  But that was then.  My world is changing in ways that now make that thought actually appealing and maybe a necessity. and Fiji was the first such trip I took.  

This summer is a summer of firsts in that respect.  To actually be able to think about a vacation without my little guy is a bit of a stretch..and I did it!  I guess knowing bestie Donna was going to be there with her family really helped a lot. 

Even during the trip home, I didn’t go about it as I normally did in previous years.  I didn’t plan for anything specific except that weekends would be saved for the family.  Secondly, I wanted to make a deliberate effort to see people I had many trips ago meant to see but never did for one reason or another. Instead of scheduling meet ups weeks ahead by announcing my arrival, I chose to stay quiet the first four days to maximize time at home, then I sent out the messages.  Some fot responses, and those that were met by silence, I simply dismissed as a result of people just being too busy.  Other friends I waited to say hello, and others I simply just didn’t have the time or resources to meet.  I kept things simple and scheduled from day to day.  I have never really been one to expect a grand asalto, and even coffee or a drink would suffice.  I was deeply touched that my godson and his wife even flew in from Cebu where they are now based to see me.  And friends from way back indulged my simple requests to have my favorite treats.

One thing I had to do this trip was to plan my expenses properly due to budget constraints.  Where I would normally pick up the tab, I had to opt out of for practical reasons.  I even decided to forego my usual craft haul shopping — something that wasn’t really difficult to do, given how I still have a ton of supplies here in New York.  I did look around for local handmade fabric for my sewing projects, but the rains were not much help in getting around.  

All in all, it has been a productive summer for me.  I can even say at this point that I can safely put a dot to the sentence of summer 2016 without feeling like it just passed by uneventfully.  I am still not quite where I had hoped to be in terms of the year-long goals I had, but I have certain obstacles in my way I have no control of.  I’m not sweating it.  I think I did pretty well even, compared to Summers past.  

I’m sort of in between phases in my life which seems to be quite a long winded refrain I keep coming back to— but that’s the truth.  So I have been doing new things and shedding practices of the past, trying to move forward each day.  This summer might yet be unique if only for that– as I hope that I will have crossed fully to the next phase by the time the seasons bring me to this time next year. 

In the meantime, summer is not yet totally over.  Let’s see what happens the next few weeks as we head into fall.
 

Having myself a Fab Summer

I was listening to Coldplay’s “Til Kingdom Come” for probably the 5th time while my bus was crawling out of the Midtown Tunnel yesterday when the title above came to mind.  I almost forgot that I was having a difficult time drawing my right eye with a flick — and before finishing the second, I clicked on the WordPress app and started writing.  (Eyes have been taken cared of..)

So how’s your summer been?

Those of you in New York City know we’ve gotten lucky with  moderate temperatures until this week, and even that has been a break.  We haven’t really had the sweltering heat of the past summers and that was unexpected.  The previous winter, mild as it was, tends to make us expect a harsher summer.  And we haven’t had that– yet.  Of course we’re just hitting the midpoint of summer and I could be speaking too soon, but I’ve always been a “warmer climate” person considering where I was born and raised.  Manila’s heatwave gives you good training for the hot summers of New York, but then it’s dry heat here.  (Imagine walking into an oven.)

I’ve been exploring more of the city during the weekends and lingering on later in the day.  It helps that the little guy is in Manila enjoying his summer break with his cousins, so I need not rush home to make dinner.  It’s been a time of new beginnings, plans and things that need to be done.  It’s also a time of renewal.  (More on that in another post.)

Unfortunately, I see the summer slipping by with some things falling through the cracks.  I will hopefully get to do a check-in on my 15 things for 2015 although I’m almost dreading it because I’m afraid I have missed out on many of the things I had hoped to accomplish, and half the year has slipped by.

The good news is I’M READING AGAIN.  I am actually so thrilled about actually lugging a book in my purse these days that I have taken to having the book within arm’s reach just so I can look and touch its pages.  (We call that shallow or mababaw back where come from.)  Simple thrills.

The truth of the matter is, I had schlepped down to Barnes & Noble to buy some books requested by my nephew and niece.  I am always drawn to the tables where books are laid flat, enabling you to see stacks of it on top of each other.  There were no Minecraft books as requested by the nephew, and for the life of me, I couldn’t find the photo sent by my sister-in-law for my niece’s request.  So I walked around towards the tables and lo and behold, the book was right there: A Work in Progress: A Memoir by Connor Franta.  The thing was it was on a “Buy-2-get-the-3rd-free” table so I found myself walking around trying to decide if I will just get the book for my niece or if I will get two more.  Of course I got two more!  (Have to get that Barnes & Noble membership going!)

I have missed reading and the thought that I am finally getting down to doing some serious page-turning makes me kind of giddy happy.  Kind of.  At almost fifty, (yes, the Pinay New Yorker is THAT old) — I have discovered that the things that make me smile are no longer as profound or earth shattering or remarkable like they used to be.  These days, when a stranger says “Beautiful dress!” or “What a lovely necklace..”  from out of nowhere, that is reason enough to smile.  (This is the same dress that has seen a lady walk up to me at a grocery to tell me what a lovely dress I was wearing.  I am NEVER parting with this dress even when it is no longer age appropriate!)  Or maybe talking about movies or music or GoT.  (And if you don’t know what that stands for, then you aren’t in our ‘circle’.)  It’s being able to mention something from the 80s and know that you won’t get a puzzled look that tells you you’re from two different generations.  (As my brother who is only 3 years younger than me would say, that would be a generation gap.)

So what is my fabulous summer all about?  

It’s about the Nutella Bar in Eataly which seems to have a hypnotic hold on me now, every time I’m in the area.  Not even the usual lines or throng of people going in and out of the place has deterred me from making a quick stop whenever I can.  On the contrary, it’s all those people walking around and the anonymity of walking in that crowd that kind of makes me feel at home in this place.

No, it’s not that sweet — even the sweet cream needs a little bit of nutella in it to make it really sinful.  I find it to be a good palate cleanser, though.  (Excuses, excuses!)

It’s about dreaming of learning how to sew (finally!) — but knowing it’ll have to wait for when I return from the next trip home.  So in the meantime, I’m focusing on hair accessories and trying to get my creative juices flowing to enable me to bring some pieces to give away as gifts in a week and a half.  I’ve startred sorting out my jewelry supplies as well with a more determined plan to actually revive the store on Etsy.   And no, I didn’t forget about my newfound interest in crochet — freeform crochet to be exact — as I featured in my craft blog, GothamChick just a few weeks back here and here.

I’m starting to go back to music that I love — jazz, in particular — and learning along the way.  It’s music that soothes and draws me to a time way back when I got so immersed in learning about modern jazz.   Back when they had a record bar (which is where they used to have shelves upon shelves of vinyl and stacks of cassette tapes), the lady in charge would lay out the latest releases and make her recommendations.  It is because of her that I heard of Eloise Laws, Donald Byrd, in addition to the staples of Alphonse Mouzon, Earl Klugh, Noel Pointer and Seawind to name a few.  Now I’m listening to Avishai Cohen who I was looking forward to watching “Live” in NYC but I just heard his tour had been altogether cancelled.. (Bummer..)

Summer’s been a time to enjoy movies, old and new, that friends have been recommending.   Don’t you just hate it  when people start talking about some title and ask you if you’ve watched it and you realize you’re way behind?  I never pretended to be a cinephile but I do appreciate good films.  I just haven’t had the time to sit in a theatre or find out what’s new.  (I miss Mr. Moviefone ..)  The good news is I am now raving about Everything Is Illuminated, Fading Gigolo and the original The Producers (1968).  I am not a film critic nor one of those people who try to dissect the “layers of acting” or the “depth of the story”.  I watch movies to enjoy them and I always try to sit in front of a screen with as little expectations of the story or the acting or directing.  I think we, as members of the audience, should just sit there and enjoy.  Every film, even those that are retellings of stories we already know are meant to entertain but will only succeed in doing that if we let them.  Save the popcorn — I’m still working my way down a list of other great movies.

I’ve made the effort to reconnect with friends from waaaaaayyyyyyy back.  As a friend from gradeschool wrote me, “(I) am happy to know that you are well on your way to getting to know yourself again and that you’re making strides where reconnecting with old friends is concerned. We do tend to lose ourselves when in relationships and though that’s not necessarily a bad thing, it is at times unhealthy. ”  (Bernadette aka Bambi has always written so eloquently.)

The sad part of being here in New York is that although some people maybe in the same neighborhood, connecting can take a lot of effort.  Sadly, we don’t all give it the effort it deserves.  Sometimes all it takes is an e-mail, a message on Facebook, or a chance encounter when you’re on the bus and you see a familiar face fiddling with her phone at street level.  (The Universe speaks, again.)

I miss my little guy but I am grateful for the break to focus on myself the last couple of weeks.  It makes me look forward to being with him again when I go home to pick him up in Manila in just over a week.  And there is so much to look forward to when I return to my home, New York, and ride out the last days of summer as we go into my next favorite season: Autumn.

Here’s to a wonderful rest of the summer for everyone.

Grateful

Is the weekend really over?  The next long weekend we are looking forward to is not for another couple of weeks, but I have better things coming up like  a trip to Manila to pick up my son before the next holiday.

But I’m getting ahead of myself here.

I have been focusing on moving forward and have been taking care of “me”.  With my little guy back in Manila, it has been easier to focus on taking care of the one who takes care of him most of the time.  I’m finally able to concentrate on the things that I usually gloss over, or those things that have to “wait” when I have to worry about dinner or homework or giving in to having him sit on my lap.  Instead of focusing on “‘Me” time after 10pm or so, I’ve devoted a whole weekend to doing just that.  And while I do miss my son, I have enjoyed the “alone” time.

I have been sorting through things and trying to discard what needs to be thrown away, and further sorting through the things I want to keep.  And I’ve also been packing.  I have seen things I had forgotten I had — not just craft supplies but mementos that are now being tucked into a box for safekeeping.

I end my weekend feeling grateful.

…for the flowers blooming all around me.  One thing I truly enjoy about summer is that all the blooms come to life in seeming shifts.  The tulips may be gone but the hydrangeas in their pretty colors are here to stay.  I even have a bunch all dried and yet still lovely in a small vase on my ledge at work.  They color our lives in a different way — and I have always loved how they remind us that life goes on and on and on.

…for sunny days.  Yes, even the ones that start out dark and grey with some rain.  It’s been a glorious weekend celebrating freedom and we have been blessed with sunshine.

…for summer.  This is really my time of the year.  No matter how punishing the heat may be, I love this season and all the energy it brings.  Everything comes to life — the trees that are bare in the winter are heavy with their greens.  You find yourself taking the time to walk a little slower to look up at the blue skies.  It’s not too cold to stop and sit in the park.  You can actually enjoy the outdoors even if you’re not outdoorsy like me.

…looking forward to Manila.  I had a good trip home last April — short as that was.  I usually stay 3 weeks but managed only 2 1/2 weeks then.  It will even be shorter this time around because I’m really going home just to pick up Angelo and bring him home.

He had been requesting to spend summer there because that would mean a longer stay, and no homework for a change.  He has refused to go to summer camp the last year or two, so I thought it wasn’t that bad an idea to give in this year.  I can never go home too often with my entire family still there.  Just spending time with my Mom is incentive enough.

…for dessert.  I have an insatiable sweet tooth.  And I find it sad that though we all eat as a matter of necessity, the surge in health consciousness has caused this part of the meal to be shunned and treated as optional.  The way I look at it, that’s much too much of a deprivation and I’d rather skip the main course if it would allow me to indulge.  Life is too short, everyone says.  Some things I just can’t do without, and dessert is one of them.

Yay for butter pecan ice cream, the yummy milk or white chocolate wafer-thin slice (which I would much prefer over truffles but they are most welcome, too..), the Bailey’s double on the rocks I want to nurse through the end notes of a conversation after a good meal.  And dessert is best shared with another– like this light but still decadent Il Floutille from the 4th of July brunch with my dear friend, Peter, at A.O.C. New York.  I make a mean Leche flan myself which girlfriend Mily will swear by..

I think of all these things and I can’t help but smile and feel so lucky to be at this place where no matter how crazy life may get, I know I am blessed with so much. So tell me .. what are you grateful for?

Milestones and moving on

I started writing this Saturday morning but never got to finish it until the whole day ended and moved on to Sunday.  It was a jampacked half of the weekend which didn’t turn out as bad as I was afraid it will be. My little guy just graduated from fifth grade (yay!) and had a graduation party at a bounce place.  It was quite the no-frills celebration which only required a reservation and invitations a couple of weeks ago. Unlike his first two parties at this bounce venue, I didn’t have to worry about giveaways or hitting the minimum this time around.  We hit it well before today but way after the deadline.  (Note to parents out there: Please put yourselves in the shoes of the parent waiting for you to confirm your child’s attendance.  It CAN be nerve-wracking thinking the party might turn out to be a dud so please meet the RSVP deadline promptly.)

I also had to get him ready for a long vacation in Manila.  Father and son go first and I pick him up on the tail end.  I’ve been to Manila this year so the trip isn’t really for me.  I just think it’s time we gave him what he’s always been asking for — a homework-free, longer stay with his cousins.  Forget that it isn’t summer in the Philippine right now, so they’re all going to school.  As long as he doesn’t get a homework packet like he normally does when we leave at Christmas time (because we take him out a week or so before school officially ends for the holidays), he can look forward to just bumming around and enjoying his parents’ land of birth.

He’s grown so much that I am good with having him away THAT long.  I think with all that’s been happening on this end, we can both use a little break and time to grow and shift gears.  And when he returns for middle school, we will both be ready to move on.

We’ve gone on so many trips and with only one guy tagging along, I think I’ve got packing down to a science.  The only difference is I won’t be there, but I’m not worried because after his Dad returns to New York after the first two weeks, he will be with my brother and his family, my sister and other brother and mom.  Being an only son, they are the family he looks to for his ‘brother’ and ‘sisters’.  There he is a younger sibling with an “Ate Julia” and “Kuya Angel” to two others.  (“Ate” and “Kuya” are terms of respect for older relations, the former being feminine, and the latter, masculine.)  I am hoping he can pick up some Tagalog, and I’m tasking my sister who used to be a teacher to teach him cursive.  (Don’t get me started on that one!)

Medication (mostly first aid) ready.  Ear thermometer which is as old as he is, packed with the extra plastic covers.  Ointments?  Butt cream?  (Ewe…. hey, we need to be ready for ANY eventuality..)  Wipes?  they can get them there.. Dramamine?  (His dad’s taking care of that.)  He’s refusing to bring his seasick bands which is him growing up, I guess.  (I will pack them anyway.)  Snacks?  I think I have that covered.

It doesn’t help that my little guy is the pickiest of eaters, but I’m hoping that his newfound curiosity about food will make him more adventurous.  He is asking more and more what it is that I am eating, although he isn’t quite as brave to try it as often as I wish he would.  But at least the curiosity is there.. baby steps, I tell myself.

Saying goodbye was not quite as run-of-the-mill like most of our partings.  I knew he was holding back the tears, but the big boy that he now is, he just kept the hugs short enough to make it meaningful without giving the tears a chance to make the appearance.  My boy is growing up indeed… sometimes it’s hard for a mother to keep up, but we eventually catch up.

Over breakfast

I slept normal last night which was a first in many days.  I was in bed before midnight and made sure to shut all my electronic devices when the witching hour came.  Instead of lingering and having difficulty sleeping, I drifted off to la-la land almost instantaneously.  I know because I don’t remember anything after closing my eyes.  No stressful dreams of people who haunt me into a stressful awakening.  Bliss.

I woke up earlier than usual, too, which is good.  So instead of immediately getting down to the business of getting myself ready for work, I sat down at our breakfast counter, powered up the laptop, and then proceeded to enjoy a quarter slice of the raisin walnut loaf I picked up from Maison Kayser in the Flat Iron district.  It might not be one of his fancy pastries or desserts, but this bread is a heavenly treat.  I can make do with it and butter for a meal.  (Which I will indulge in later for lunch.)

I checked my messages (the boss is on the other side of the world but thankfully has kept to emailing me at the start of HIS day, end of mine, instead of some ungodly hour — but it still pays to check — just in case.)  I said my morning prayer — something I’ve been good with even if reading the scripture readings via Kerygma’s Daily Readings has not been as easy to do regularly.  And I sat down here, determined to write a morning post.

I can hear the humming of the refrigerator and nothing much else.  The TV is off because I’m the only one in the house — everyone else is asleep or gone off to work.  I’m just savoring this alone time where the only sense of urgency comes from the cadence of the laptop keys as I strike them.

The half dozen or so posts in my head are still in my head.  While I have been writing, it’s been more of the spontaneous account of the “thought of the moment” or major activity of the day.  I still hear the words coming forth in my head as I go about doing my work — or even as I hold the clay in my hands, trying to experiment with this new design I wanted to come up with.

Yesterday, the anger almost crept up on my again.  I don’t want to say it’s getting easier to let it go — I think I’ve just gotten better at it.  I breathe in.  I calmly tell myself to let it go.  Another deep breath.  I pray that God help me to let it go.  And I think that is what does it for me.

Time to get ready for work again.  I’ve indulged enough here and must head back to the real world and do my part for the day.

 

 

 

In the middle of…

I have spent the better part of a half hour trying to fix these photos and I know when it’s time to give up.  More so after I had written a whole post which disappeared on me without saving on the same topic.  Let it be, I tell myself.

I created these pieces between the weekend and the past couple of nights — and although I haven’t gotten back to them to give them a more definite form, “beginning a piece” is a welcome development.  Beginning something means having something to finish.

The top most piece is a necklace which I will probably do lariat length — to be worn double looped around the neck. It’s simply a random rosary-style stringing of 8 types of blue beads from agate to dyed jade. I left it with around a third undone. So almost there.

The second is a design I am trying to follow from Bead Magazine and I’m just so thrilled to be able to finally use these serpentine beads I had bought a while back. I had around 3 strands because they were on sale, and although they’re not flashy nor colorful, I like the muted green and how earthy it feels when I look at them. Still in progress as I try to decide what I will put in the middle as a suitable focal.

The earrings above, believe it or not, came upon me half an hour before midnight — and no, I didn’t hesitate to go back to my work station and try to do what I thought up in my already sleepy head.  It’s an initial idea — not quite the finished product.  I have quite a few of these top-drilled faceted tear drop beads which I had purchased in the hopes of pulling them together into colorful dainty pieces.  These are the earth-tones.  I have a few pastel colored beads to play around with as well.

And I’ve been art journaling again. Or simply journaling, actually. Too many things to write about and I want to seriously catch up after slacking off the past couple of weeks. I really felt bad about not being able to touch my altered book that I had foregone my Friday Five the last week (or is two?) but it will be back tomorrow — promise.

Another weekend is here and school’s over. And after Monday, half the year is gone. Has it been that long since we greeted 2014?

I feel like I’ve been stuck — but time continues to fly. Next year, Angelo will be in Fifth grade.. can you believe that? Sometimes I watch him and look at him from afar and I actually say it out loud — please don’t grow up too fast.

Unfortunately, that is something we parents have no control over. My little guy is growing up so fast. I am grateful for that and also wistful at the thought that my baby is no longer the helpless little child he used to be.

Another weekend and he has been saying no to half the things we propose to make it an interesting weekend for all of us. He said no to the waterpark… which means no outlet for me. And I don’t really mind that. I am happy to see him developing his preferences. It shows that he has a mind of his own now.

I will hopefully be able to finish a necklace or two and photograph it for the shop. I am craving to photograph the pieces on a live model, but that’s a little tricky to negotiate. My necklace display stand is upstairs, or I can stick to a simpler studio set up just to show how it hangs. Maybe.

Sleep beckons. That’s it for me. Or else I might yet get another half-hour-before-midnight flash of inspiration and get creating. Happy (almost) Friday to all!
 

The Last Blooms of Summer

Saturday evening and it’s minutes to midnight (again). I’m ready to head off to la-la land and I’m looking at a rather early start tomorrow. First day of Sunday school. So I guess sleeping in is not an option. Well, I can always take a nap in the afternoon. That’s tomorrow.

I took these pictures last week as an ode to the end of summer. It’s gotten chilly and I’m getting my fabric scarves washed and ready, and I have to start prepping the fall gear. Summer over? You bet it is.

The days are shorter… the mornings are nippy. And the trees are no longer as deep a green as they are in the thick of summer.

The work calendar also tells me that the days are moving faster now, as if we had picked up the pace and started walking briskly to the end of another year. And the “ber” months are here. In the Philippines, Christmas begins when September comes.. we have one of the longest holiday seasons in the world. But that’s looking forward to what’s yet to come… my favorite time of the year: Christmas.

I almost hate myself for having forgotten my Auntie Lydia’s birthday. My dear, dear Auntie Lydia who was like a second mother to me. She passed over 20 years ago, but she was such a part of my life that even after all these years, I miss her dearly.

And the end of August was also my older brother’s birthday. He who is the one I never knew but whose absence in my life creates a vacuum so big that I had to steer clear of writing about him this year. July and August have been very heavy remembering emotional losses. September, I hope, will bring a renewal of spirit and hope.

I’m trying not to stress out about the fact that the boy is asking me what we have planned tomorrow. The truth is, I don’t really have a plan. It’s just him and me for the next couple of days, including the school opening for New York on Monday.

I thought I’d avoid the stress of knowing I had to rush to work after being late by taking the mornings off. This way I can rest between the walk to and from school before heading in the opposite direction to take the bus to Manhattan.

I can’t believe he’s now entering the fourth grade. =) Typing that made me smile. My boy is another year older, and when people ask me how old he is, I proudly say “9 going on 19.” I almost don’t want to see him grow up so fast, and yet I marvel at the person he’s become.

He’s worried he might be asked to recite the Apostle’s Creed tomorrow and I had to reassure him it was just an orientation. Every possibility I had offered him doesn’t sound appealing, it seems, more so because it would mean taking the bus, local or express. I even offered him a trip to the city after we fed his grandma and then we can take a peek into our favorite museum or just see what’s happening in Manhattan. He said no. We were in Bay Terrace earlier, a shopping complex almost like Greenhills in a smaller scale, and I offered to go back there, but he said no again.

I wouldn’t mind just walking to the corner and checking out the dollar store. I have chores to finish at home.

We’ll see how our Sunday shapes up — as we start getting ready to greet Autumn and say goodbye to summer.

Summer Blooms

We have a very patient gardener in our midst in my co-op community who fills up this tiny patch of land around her unit with gorgeous flowers every summer.  I snapped these shots with my Blackberry Bold this morning as I waited for the car to pull out of our garage.

It seems the heat has let up some and it was even a bit chilly when I walked out of the house today.   With the last day of July here, we’re getting ready for fall.
Well, maybe not quite.  I’d like to enjoy these colorful blooms just a wee bit longer.

Not yet, anyway. Give or take a few more weeks.  I went around my favorite Bryant Park last week to take pictures of the blooms there but have yet to transfer my digital photos to my PC for uploading.  Those flowers have their own story to tell.

Between sighs

We finally got a reprieve from the heat today. I actually noticed a cooler breeze last night which was a refreshing change from the otherwise oppressive heat of the previous weeks. It was even chilly this morning. Nature has its way of balancing things as always.

My rain boots proved to be unnecessary but I hate walking home in the rain with the extra aggravation of literally walking with cold feet.

My mood seems to be in synch with the gloomy weather these days. I don’t know if it’s my late father’s birthday coming upon us or his death anniversary around the corner, or the finality of saying goodbye to Donna again who leaves our side of the world tonight to go back down under. July is not an upbeat month. So I try harder to make it upbeat — I think of my favorite niece, Julia’s birthday… And summer which, despite its punishing heat, is my favorite season because it’s the closest New York will ever come to mimicking the hot days back in Manila. I think of July as being past midway through the year which means December cannot be far behind.

They said that if you think happy thoughts and try to make a list of blessings in your life, you will actually be able to fight the sadness.

And there’s just avoiding wallowing in the negative. I thought about writing about Papa but thinking of his birthday and passing in one linear thought is just too much for my heart to bear. Even just glossing it over now is hard. The grieving never really stops or ends. We just learn to cope better.